09 March 16  |  Events   |  

What Are Some of the Most Unusual Wedding Vows?

In the hustle and bustle of a wedding ceremony, it may be difficult to remember later just exactly what you said during the climatic moments. After all, people are watching, nerves are frayed, emotions are high. Who cares about the marital vow?

Here’s the traditional version: “I, ___, take thee, ___, to be my wedded husband/wife, to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us part, according to God’s holy ordinance; and thereto I pledge thee my faith [or] pledge myself to you.” Lovely? Yes. But what are some of the more unusual wedding vows?

Here are some excerpted vows from Offbeat Bride:

  • For Vulcans: Today is mostly an ordinary day, the sun rose, babies were born, people slept in and we just so happened to be getting married.
  • For Prospective Zombies: Do you take [name] to be your husband, to have and to hold from this day forward for better or for worse … to love and to cherish until death or zombies do you part?
  • For Space Cadets: I, [name], take you, [name], to be my [husband/wife], in equal love, as a mirror of my true self, as a partner on my path, to honor and to cherish in sorrow and in joy, till death do us part.
  • For the Unimaginative: I am proud to take you as my husband/wife. For all the time we have been together, there has always been the kind of mutual understanding which is only shared when there is true love.
  • For the Overly Imaginative: I promise to always leave the lights on in the bathroom. I promise to mysteriously take three hours to make a simple omelet. I promise to create a life for us of unexpected and strange adventures.
  • For the Overly Medicated: Once upon an evening splendid. We all gathered and intended. To witness marriage of two people we most certainly adore. After that unique procession there might be some apprehension. If there will be more digression from what we thought would be in store. But now we must all get serious for the rest that is in store. Just the vows and nothing more.
  • For Those Who Need To Be Medicated: I promise to leave my apple cores and dirty butter knives on the counter. I promise to overdraft the checking account. I promise to complain about the kitty litter. I vow to encourage us to try new and strange things. I vow to fill your ‘I love you’ bank every day.
  • For The Sailors: I promise today to be your navigator, best friend and wife; honor, love, and cherish you through all of life’s adventures… I take you today to be my co-captain of team [last name].
  • For the Lost Cause: I, [name], before these nutters assembled; take this strumpet to be my wife, my friend, my lover, my hot water bottle, my companion in life, my enabler in trouble and my poster of bail. I will care for and protect you, nurture you and support you, and tell you when you are being a numpty and adore everything about you. I promise to love you tirelessly through perfect times and the merely fabulous times, regardless of how often you get distracted by something shiny. I vow above all things to remain unchanged in this, even if I should – Look a birdee! – be momentarily distracted by something shiny myself.

groom and bride on their wedding day

We at Golden Ocala Golf & Equestrian aren’t so interested in how you express your devotion as we are in creating the fabulous, most wonderful backdrop for the wedding of your lifetime.

Our wedding planner will make your day memorable. Select from our Platinum, Gold and Silver packages for an amazing reception. Each package includes some spectacular enhancements.

By booking the entire wedding here at Golden Ocala, many additional facility fees are waived including rehearsal dinners, bridal showers, engagement photo shoots, bachelorette gatherings and bachelor parties. Contact Julianne Cuomo, Director of Celebrations, to begin planning your special day.

Comments are closed here.